Believe it or not the answer to the above question is probably yes! In the book Reptiles in Love by Don Ferguson ( I must admit I'm a sucker for a catchy title), the author talks about the primitive repitilian brain and how it is activated in intimate relationships.  The repitilian brain is our amygdala or the most primitive part of the brain, best known for the flight/fight response. When this part of the brain is activated, there is no access to our cognitive function. The best example of this is when there is an emergency and we act on instinct than decompress once we realize what we've survived.

    Dr. Ferguson maintains that in the marital relationship, once the honeymoon is over, we are at our most vulnerable positions with our spouse and if they "attack us", our repitilian brain kicks into action to protect us.The goal for a more civilized relationship is to move out of reptilian brain mode and allow our cognitive brain to control our actions. Ferguson offers ways to identify when our primitive responses are being activated then offers a five step model to help couples relate to each other on a different level. In addition he offers advice on special situations like affairs and how to have an amicable divorce if the relationship is beyond repair.

    The author incorporates several schools of couples therapy into his book and presents them in an easy to read format. I found his advice sound and his suggestions useful and I liked the way he positioned his suggestions as experiments and advised that couples try several and find the ones that work best. He focuses couples on key issues such as "what is the fight really about?" then offers useful ways to work through issues.

     He uses case studies throughout the book but seems to try to liven them up with cutesy language which makes them less effective. I also found the jokes that he uses to be distracting and at times irritating. If you can read beyond the jokes or maybe if you share his particular sense of humor, the book can be helpful.

     Overall, I found this to be a good read- maybe a first book to begin a conversation about relationship. If a couple is volatile, they will need the help of a therapist in working through some of the suggestions.  If the relationship is in the early stages of change, this book might help a couple begin to make some significant changes in the ways they relate to each other.